Sunday, July 09, 2006

:(


Hey all,
If your in a good mood..don't read on as this isn't going to be a nice post and I don't want to spoil your day.
For many years I have batted the 'black dog' as they call it and have taken anti-depressants since my 5th child was born and he is now 10yrs old. I've taken these meds on and off and I have never cared what other people have thought of me taking them as I've also had to take them for a muscle disease I have also and they stimulate the nerves apparently so not as much pain is felt or something like that.
Anyway..it's been quite some time now since I've been on any meds as I found the last ones were making too dependant and giving me head spins every time I forgot to take them which is stupid of me I know..but hey..thats why I've got so many kids from not taking pills. :)
Now I think it's time for me to go back on these tablets as I'm starting to go off the rails again..well not starting..getting worse. I usually know when it's time to go back on them and I go and see my doctor straight away but he has moved to another practise and I refuse to go and see him as it's a huge medical centre and you sit there for hours waiting for him.
I know I need these meds as my behaviour as been atrocious to say the least and I really am a nightmare at the moment. I also can't blame giving up smoking forever..I need to look beyond that.
So..when Michael gets home from cricket with one of the boys..I will no doubt have to apologise for my behaviour this morning and for the very hurtful things I said...again. I don't know how much a person can take..but I know I'm not the only person in this house who can dish it out either.
I'm sorry for my ramblings this morning and I know I've only told half a story but I feel really surreal and I know I'm sitting here blabbering shit..LOL
I'll share with you the layout I finished last night..it's the 4th for Mardis' scrap to shop challenge. I had this pic on my desk for a couple of days and I knew what I wanted to do with it..it just wouldn't come together. Bit like my life at the moment.
Cheers
Sharryn :)

4 comments:

Bec said...

Hey hun :-) You may need to find a new Dr and get all of your files transferred over to the new one. Thats only if you really don't want to wait for hours..and I wouldn't blame you! My Dr did the same thing, moved to a huge centre and now we wait on average an hour after our appt time. If you feel you need the meds hun then there is NO SHAME in that! I too have been on anti-depressants.(And prolly should be on them again)
And I totally LOVE that layout there. Looks bloody awesome if ya ask me! Chin up, I personally think you are an amazing woman.

Love n Hugz
Bec

Sam said...

LO looks fantastic Shazz...
All too often I say things that I wish I hadn't and could take back :(
I have been fighting anti depressants for awhile now... doc recommended them but I am really hesitant to go on them because I have seen how they have affected my dad. But everyone is different and you know yourself better than anyone and know if it's the right thing for you. I agree with what Bec has said
Take Care
Sam

Kylie said...

hey woman! if you need to go back on them GO BACK ON THEM. there is absolutely no shame in being on ads for whatever reason and you deserve to feel better than you feel. if you need a good dr, the one i go to is dr ghobrial at the good shepherd clinic at mt annan. he's really nice and good and stuff. good luck. and that layout is sensational.

Mardi said...

Hey Sharryn...get yourself a new Doc...maybe the one Kylie is recomending..and get yourself feeling back on top again...who cares if you are on meds...so is well over half the population. Just want to add that your layouts have been absolutley bloomin stunning lately....you are on fire!!
Im so loving having you around the place at 'bugs' too.
Take care...Im always available if you want to chat too...hugs Mardi x

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